Alcoholic Liver Cirrhosis Insidious Disease of Death

The subject comes painfully close to home for one reporter.

Lela's husband passed away recently from alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver

(SALEM, Ore.) - This article is about alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver. Cirrhosis can be caused by other physiological problems and diseases, but alcoholic liver cirrhosis is a social issue that affects not only the person suffering, but also their family and friends.

Hopefully, my story may help someone you or someone you know to recognize the symptoms of this disease and take the steps to end the process before it is too late. Death by alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver is devastating, but there can be hope if it is recognized in a timely manner and medical help is obtained.

For many years I watched my husband slowly drink himself to death. Because of the nature of “alcoholism” he was convinced he had no problem. He drank because he liked it.

He was what I refer to as a “functional alcoholic.” He seemed to maintain and function quite well. He was not vicious nor out of control. He didn’t do inappropriate things. He always got up in the morning; he attended to activities he wanted to accomplish, and he went to work on a daily basis.

After retiring, he maintained our household responsibilities of paying bills, shopping, playing with his grandchildren, and occasionally going on trips to visit relatives in another state.

Two years ago though, his body started slowing down. He refused to go places because he was afraid to travel too far from home. His many trips to the bathroom during the day began to interfere with his ability to even go to the store.

His skin began to resemble yellow, aged paper and the whites of his eyes took on the same yellow tinge. Red spots started appearing on his arms and legs. A slight bump would leave a red bruise under his skin that didn’t go away.

His feet, legs, and stomach swelled to the point that he could no longer fit comfortably in his shoes or clothes.

Yet in spite of all of this, he refused to go to the doctor. He refused to talk about his declining health. He would go to the liquor store and buy his whiskey before he started drinking for the day, as he didn’t start still after 2;00 PM and then continue till 2:00 AM.

After watching his decline and listening to his refusal to admit to his problem, I printed an Internet article describing his symptoms, only the article referred to congestive heart failure. I taped this article to his arm chair and wrote “READ THIS!” He did; it scared him; he called the doctor. Sadly, only because he thought he had something wrong with his heart! The alcoholic is so unwilling to admit to his disease. Someone told me once alcohol convinces its victims they have no disease.

According to an article written by Howard J. Worman, M.D., “Alcohol abuse is a leading cause of morbidity and mortality throughout the world... Alcohol affects many organ systems of the body, but perhaps most notably affected are the central nervous system and the liver. Almost all ingested alcohol is metabolized in the liver and excessive alcohol use can lead to acute and chronic liver disease. Liver cirrhosis resulting from alcohol abuse is one of the ten leading causes of death in the United States.”

After going to the doctor and after the EKG and other tests showed no significant heart problems, it was identified he had suffered a couple strokes, which had gone unrecognized as he was usually so intoxicated by bedtime his strokes must have appeared to have been just “too much booze.”

His primary care physician referred him to a gastroenterologist to identify and confirm her suspicion of cirrhosis of the liver. This took almost a month to get the referral and the appointment.

By this time, he realized his “drinking” must be causing a problem and he slowed down to just having two drinks a night and felt proud of himself as he was “watering” them down. Upon seeing the specialist, he was told “Do not drink another drop of liquor, do not look at it, and don’t even smell it! You have to abstain from drinking for six months before you can even be considered for a transplant. You could die from this.”

The doctor was firm. He looked him in the eyes, and told him the same things I had been telling him the last two years. He quit drinking that very day but it was too late. In six months he was dead. He died a horrible death.

After many trips to the hospital, the decision was made to place him in a care facility as his needs were too much for me to assist with at home. His decline was heartbreaking to watch as his body wasted away. His inability to do the physical therapy and his frustration over not being able to come home sent me home in tears many times.

Watching him go through the bouts of draining up to eight pounds or more of fluids off his stomach and seeing his mind slip to another place where his reality was “never-never land” became unbearable and sad to witness. After two months in the care facility, the days of violent vomiting of blood began - the prelude to the end.

Fear came to his eyes as he became aware his life was nearing the end. His reaching for my hand to hold as if it was a lifeline before letting go to the “other side” was at times more than I could bear.

This man who I loved for 18 years finally slipped into the silent sleep just before death. I looked at him lying there and knew he was finally at peace. As I felt his cold hands I knew death was near and bent down and kissed his forehead and said my farewell. I had to leave as I knew the solitude of the moment was between him, death and God. After I left, he silently slipped away.

I hope in telling my story, which after only two months, still bears the pain of loss, I can help someone recognize the need to reach out for help if they recognize symptoms of alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver of someone they love or of self. I offer, again, another quote from Howard J. Worman, M.D., “REMEMBER, LIVER DISEASE IS NOT THE ONLY LIFE-THREATENING COMPLICATION OF ALCOHOL USE DISORDERS. ALL ALCOHOLICS MUST ABSTAIN FROM DRINKING AS NUMEROUS OTHER ALCOHOL-RELATED MEDICAL, SOCIAL AND PSYCHOLOGICAL PROBLEMS CAN LEAD TO MORBIDITY AND MORTALITY.”

Below are some links to other articles concerning this subject:
cumc.columbia.edu
herbalprovider.com
alcoholanswers.org
webmd.com/digestive-disorders/cirrhosis-liver

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My wife died 3-weeks ago from cirrhosis. It is a horrible way to go. She never coughed up blood nor hemoridged, just lost a lot of weight, stomach swelled, couldn't walk, had jaundice and eventually went into a coma with eyes open, arms moving, heavy breathing and eventual death. It happened within a matter of two weeks.

Thank you for sharing. Your story has helped alot. And thank you for candid explanation of what you two have been going through. I'm so anxious to know everything about this cirrhosis. I'm to the point that I want someone to tell me exactly what's going to happen to us and how and where. But that can't be done.

All the comments were very helpful to me. Can anyone tell me that when the brain is affected by the toxins is that near the end? From Mayo Clinic website, I read that the end is near when the memory is affected. Has anyone got any personal experience as to this question. My husband has been healthy all his life and at age 85, he started to be feeling "not quite right". He's 89 years old and has cirrhosis of the liver. He was only diagnosed this past June '09. Can't figure out where it came from. He drank, but not a lot, and he hasn't had a drink in the past 20 years. Younger years, 20s and 30s, he did drink. Today, he looks fine. Beginning to LOOK somewhat tired, and IS tired all the time. He sleeps about 16 to 18 hours in a 24 hour day. He's slowing down, has a fair appetite. However, these past few days the memory is lost, off and on. Mostly ON. Sometimes he doesn't recognize me and speaks to me about long gone days past, thinking I'm his sister, when he is in fact talking to ME, his wife. He has a DNR and today the doctor disabled the ICD. He still has the pace maker. He's also go a slight case of Parkinsons and has heart problems (double bi-pass) 18 years ago). He was doing gardening until September '09. I'm so confused and can't know how to read his disease. I'm not too savvy with the internet and I should be commenting instead of asking, however, I couldn't post a question. The system wouldn't let me. If anyone can please give me information on some personal experiences or knowledge that you have from studying this disease, I would appreciate it. My prayers are with all who have this disease and those caring for them. God Bless.

Thank you so much for your story. I am at this present time going through this with my 48 year old husband. He is a brilliant man and I have called him a "functional" alchololic for a long time now. He lost his company about 5 years ago and has worked from home since, which has enabled him to be closer to his bottle. He is down to about 125 pounds, yellow and in denial. I had my final conversation with him this week about his health, but he continues to be in denial that his liver is failing. Just like one of the people said to you earlier, I have been planning for his death for a while now. He may be in denial, but I am not. I work in healthcare and understand the consequences. I am now sadly awaiting his death. I will love him forever, but I realize I am not to blame.

You've helped me, but I'm still pondering the end times. My husband sleeps all the time. He's taking lactulose which is to help his brain (memories)which removes the ammonia from the system. He is awake only six hours a day, otherwise he sleeps soundly the other hours. He's got a hearty appetite. However, I ask if he's hungry his reply is "no" but he will eat whatever I make. He's weak, has memory, and is even playful when awake. He teases me by asking "when are we going home?) scares me then he laughs and says the true facts. He knows this is the end and is accepting it very well. He does not talk about the end too much. He's on hospice care. However, he's so programed for hygiene it's as though it were imbeded in his psychi to do this functions. He used to be authoritative, and controlling but now is a cute and loving and thoughtful as a lamb. He's looking out for ME. I'm confused because I don't know what to expect next after this all day, all night sleeping, awake for meals only. Nurse told me to give him his meds and he won't have the other symptom. He did not get this from alcohol but from an infection he had five (5) years ago, and now it's catching up. I feel so lost as to what to do next. I'm hour by hour. To you all suffering with this disease, I send out positive thoughts and profound prayer.

My husband is 52 and has been a heavy drinker for the 23 years that we have known each other. He drinks 4 large bottles of scotch a week! He is absolutely in denial. I believe he suffers from depression. I think he has symptoms of liver failure. He has been functioning until about a year ago. He sleeps a lot, suffers from nausea, I have not noticed jaundice although his skin does have a slight yellow tone. I feel so alone with no one to talk to. I have two children. And I am afraid he only has a few years left and I want to be prepared. I think it is sick that I am planning ahead for his loss but he refuses to go to the doctor, rehab or anything...saying he just has a few drinks every night. Although, I smell the alocohol at 7:00 a.m.

I am dying as I type from this "disease" and actually welcome the release.

I am dying as I type from this "disease" and actually welcome the release.

I am dealing with my hubby right now getting bloodwork back saying he had elevated ast when I looked it up it said it was from damage happening to his liver.He drinks everyday and like your husband he is high function.He is the sweetest man ever.The only thing we fight about is my concern for his health from all his drinking.He only drinks beer but probably 70 a week and like your husband says he likes the taste.I just wanted to know what advice anyone has for me before it is too late.I printed this article and put it in the bathroom hoping he will read I doubt he goes back to the Drs.Thanks for your story

Lela,Thankyou for your story,my cousin who is 49 years old is dying as I write I went to visit her a couple of days ago and she seem to be on her way to recovery.I was thinking in a postive wat because I went to visit her yesterday and she was on life support waiting to be moved to a different hospital,I was devestated. I didn't realize she had this problem.I have no idea how her family is going to cope but I'm praying hard because she has 3 children who also lost their father to suicide.I hope others who read these articles understand the seriousness of this disease.

My ex-husband is in the ICU dying from this disease. It has profoundly affected my daughter, who is 22 and doesn't want me there to see it. After he did his third stint in medical detox and came home, she had fun mixing him cocktails every night. I anticipate more sadness from this disease.

im so sorry 4 ur loss. i stumbled upon this because am near death myself and trying to find out how i am going to die . i am so scared i cant stop crying,and i dont know any one to talk to.i wish it could be swift but dont sound like it i am only 37 and diognosed 3 months ago. iam non operable because my red blood cells r to low ,and i wouldnt make it through a surgery. well i guess its time to go.bye bye

im so sorry 4 ur loss. i stumbled upon this because am near death myself and trying to find out how i am going to die . i am so scared i cant stop crying,and i dont know any one to talk to.i wish it could be swift but dont sound like it i am only 37 and diognosed 3 months ago. iam non operable because my red blood cells r to low ,and i wouldnt make it through a surgery. well i guess its time to go.bye bye

to all who have suffered and lost someone near and dear. our family just lost a wonderful man, he was an amazing father,son,brother, uncle,friend and more. the best cook on the planet. he loved animals and was kind and gentle. he seemed to be depressed and was suffering from arthritis and problems walking. perhaps it was his liver shutting down and he become somewhat reclusive. no one really knew. sadly he leaves two beautiful children 16 and 18 who will miss him tremendously. this disease is sneaky and mimics other chronic illnesses, he was truly loved and will be missed and fondly remembered for all he was, which was good.

my brother 47 yrs old. he is now in hospice....dying from cirrhosis. he quit drinking one and a half years ago when he had an alcoholic seizure. the damage was already done he slowly got worse and worse after recovering from the seizure.....itis very soon now that i lose my baby brother to alcoholism.

Lela:I am so sorry for your loss.My brother Glenn died June 3,2009 from a heart attack.He was only 43. Because he died so young and suddenly,they had to find out what he died from. The report from the examiners office told the family that Glenn died from Cirrhosis of the liver. This story hits close to home. Alcohol in Canada is advertized like food. Something need to be done. People around the world need to know that alcohol abuse is out of contol,especially with the youth.

Lela: I'm so sorry for your loss. My brother Glenn died June 3,2009 from cirrhosis of the liver. He was only 43 years old. The most tramatic event that I have ever experienced. I live in Lethbridge,Alberta Canada. In this country they advertise alcohol like food. In this country you hear about alcohol related deaths. The numbers don't look good. Our society has become out of control. Addiction has claimed so many people. Thank you for sharing your story. I'm not alone

I keep coming back to this site to read the comments from you who have read this article.  I am so glad that in some small way I was able to inform of this illness that is so devastating.  Thank all of you for your comments and in sharing the sorrow you are experiencing.  I wish our government would put as much effort into controls on alcohol as it does on marijuana (and I am not a pot smoker).  I have said it before, the worst I have seen from heavy pot smokers (if that is all they are doing) is they get a little too much "laid" back and less energetic, and I have never seen any physical damage.  I wish I could say the same as those who choose to make alcohol their drug of choice.  Again, thanks for your sharing and my prayers to all of you. 

Lela, this article was amazing. I am 18 years old and four months ago I buried my mom. She drank non stop from for all the time I was born. Reading your story made me realize I am not alone. My mom was also a "functional alcoholic". The last few years of her life were rough. When I was 16 she was arrested for a DUI. This was the first time she had ever been pulled over in all of her 50 years of life. It's a good feeling to know that you also loved your husband, because people think it's weird that I loved my mom. She was my best friend. I knew that she was really sick when I finally forced her to go see her sister in Florida. I forced her out of my house, on a plane, and on Florida land. Honestly, I know that was the best trip of my moms life, she had a blast. I never doubt that the reason she went was to say her last goodbye. Florida made me realize she was loosing her ability to walk. In the airport we were rushing to the gate...with my mom waddling behind. Her health declinded from there. It hurts to know that she missed my high school graduation and my 18th birthday, but I know she is watching somewhere. I really hope you know that your story DOES help people make better descions. Please don't drink!

Very touching Lela. Just ended a relationship with an alcoholic. No physical violence yet but very verbally destructive. Alcohol is his GOD. He is psycho! I feel something is about to happen as he is malnutritioned, high BP, mentally unstable, and so on. It is really ugly and scarey and so are the people he is friends with. Very cruel disease. Yes, I believe more attention should be given to alcohol use and abuse as it was tobacco. Maybe its greed.

Gee, I will be dead soon. I am an artist, and am producing my best work, knowing I will be dead soon. I feel it in my heart, I stopped drinking but it is too late. Please don't ever drink! This is not a joke not a joke to me:(

One final thought. It's been a 1 1/2 years since my wife's passing. To this day I still feel a tremendous amount of guilt. The "should have, could have" done more to help her. I tried, I begged her to slow down on the drinking. She wouldn't or couldn't. She did tell me at one point that she did this to herself. To all who wonder how long a end stager has to live. It varies. You don't die of cirrhosis, you die from numerous complications. The day before my wife died I thought she had a pretty good day. She did some cleaning etc. I woke up later that night to her "grunting". She was unresponsive. She coded on the way to the hospital. The worked on her in the er for awhile as I watched. I finally said enough was enough. I knew she wasn't going to come back. Looking at her reminded me of how much this disease changed her. She was down to 98 lbs, about 10 - 15 lbs was in her abdomen. She was yellow from head to toe. She fought hard but, this was too much of a monster for her. So, for everone else with the guilts, you aren't alone. Thank you for this article.

Editor: JB, I let Lela know about these comments and she may be able to respond, thanks for sharing your memories; as painful as they must be I'm sure you help people, thank you.

LOST MY WIFE AT THE RIPE AGE OF 46 FROM CIRRHOSIS. 2 MONTHS FROM ONSET OF JAUNDICE TO HER DEATH. IT TRULY WAS THE WORST TIME IN MY LIFE. WATCHING HER SUFFER AND WASTE AWAY WAS ABSOLUTE TORTURE. SHE IS IN A BETTER PLACE NOW BUT MISSED EVERYDAY.

my father died last april 17, 2009. the doctor said it was cirrhosis of the liver. we didn;'t know he has it. i remember seeing bruises and my father said he can't sleep at night that's why he drinks liqour. he never complained of any pain even on his last breath. i'm still crying and trying to figure out what happened? i hope daddys all over the world would stop drinking alcohol. it's no good for the whole family.

Lela, Thanks for sharing your story. My husband has been in the ICU for the past four days due to complications with his alcoholism. He has been diagnoses with cirrhosis of the liver and heart failure. He has been in and out of treatment centers for the past four years and it has been so hard for me and my two kids ages 8 and 10 sit back and watch this slow suicide and realize there is literally nothing that anyone can due to save the alcoholic from this debilitating disease!!

I kept falling down and goining crazy. Then I swelled up. Dr. said Im goining to die. cirrhosis. My employer want work me no moor. Can I get dissabilaty?

My mother passed away about 3 yrs ago for the same. i was only 17 at the time.i regret so much not being informed about the symptoms. I wish i had. She had a lost look in her eyes. I wiped her last tears. I never thought it would happen to me,never went through my mind my mom was loosing her battle. She was a loving mother. I miss her so much

thank you for the article u wrote on alcoholism. my father suffered the same as your husband. I was only 18 as I watched my father die. He was so scared.It was horrible to see him that way.The visions of him still haunt me to this day. I am now 30 but will never get those images out of my head.

Thank you for your history but to late for me my husband is diying for the same. I hope the many people read your history and stop to drink.

My beautiful 42 year old husband died on September 6th, 2008 from Alcoholic Liver Cirrhosis. If the alcohol industry had the same fight against it that the tobacco industry has, I think there would be far fewer deaths each year. We need to take a hard look about why we glorify alcohol, blame people for becoming addicted, and then have such a lousy support system for them.

Thank you for sharing your story, Lela. My brother died three weeks ago in pretty much the same way you describe.

i love your story, i have a friend who is on grave condition in the hospital now, just woke up from a week long sleep, she has already had the vomiting blood and has tranfussions,tapped her 3 times, now can not even walk and may never walk again, too weak, it is very sad thing to see, i who has never had a drink still understands the process of addiction and the disease,not real sure how much time my dear friend has but would love any info someone has,i can see she is in end stage liver, but not sure how long that is, she only stops drinking while in hospital, but soon as she gets out starts up on the vodka again, appox 3 gallon per week, i canot imagine....

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To all: Major danger for many is the fact of denial for deep symptoms of depression. That's most helpful part of Beck-approach, esp. with any persons who may, even-only just-possibly, be in beginning stages of Altheimer's--as I happen to know from personal experience with wife of 60 years. Beck-style therapy 20 years ago, unavailable here (then), might well have been extremely helpful, with other approaches we did use. IF anyone knows of Beck-type services here, might wish to share on this open, honest and demo-dialog channel...we need to share such facility while still allowed to do so, and before Constitution is finally Bush-ified or becomes pattern for another fascism-coup...as in FDR-days, by corporate combine cut off just in time.

T.S. I think my husband was suffering from depression but he would not talk about it or discuss it. When asked he always said he was just fine and happy. I think his drinking was a lifestyle he chose and no one could change him to anything else. Even though I was with him for 18 years, I don't know what his depression could have been about other than it, too, can be something one can be in denial about. I think there could be a story there, too.

T.S. et al: You are so right re one real cause for alcoholism. I know from experience, NOT mine own; and from ditto, most definitely mine own. In Chicago yrs ago was fortunate enough to interview Dr. Aaron Beck, now-famed cognitive scientist and psychiatrist, soon after his major book was published. The book (and interview) did literally change my life. I recommend information on cognitive therapy as major first step for anyone seeking such help. See Wikipedia for details on Beck's work, winner of Lasker Award in 2006.

Lela, I appreciate your sharing this story. I am one of the lucky ones whose father had a drinking problem that did not become as serious as this. The drinking, however, is a symptom. The disease, I believe (at least in my father's case) was depression. Depression is something I feel I inherited from him. What about your late husband? Was he self-medicating depression, as I believe my father did? And what of your children? I hope you add to your story. If you don't yet have these answers, I trust you will seek them out.

Thanks, Henry. If it can help at least one person, then the pain of writing my story will be worth it.

Lela: Thank you so much for having the courage and commonsense to share this personal ordeal with all of us. We can thus learn from each other, not only how to cope in such desperate straits, but also how to build strengths and deeper understandings all the way through our community. In this degenerating society we need all the cooperation we can build, simply to survive.

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